Adaptive behavior

Yesterday I had an I-cant-take-it-one-more-second moment with my hair that was way overdue for a trim.  My fav hair stylist wasn't available on 20 hours notice, so I booked with the lady next to her. As soon as I hung up, I thought I'd go out on a limb and call back to see if I could also bring Caitlin.  Caitlin's last haircut was at Dworld, and while it was fun and cute, it was also crooked. very.  It's been bothering me for the past4 months, but I haven't been very compelled to do much about it because every single haircut she's ever received has been pretty crooked.  I kind of gave up.  But, I got an uncharacteristic burst of optimism, and asked for Caitlin to come with me.

When I got home yesterday afternoon from work, I was excited to share with Caitlin that we'd get a girls' afternoon together the following day and yay, what fun.  She was not thrilled.  She did not want her hair cut. We talked for a while and she came around, but was very clear that she just wanted her hair evened out.  Fine with me--me too.

So, fast forward to the next day (today) and I was just getting home from taking Nora to a routine doctor's appointment.  Caitlin was happily ready to go to the hair salon when I returned home.  Usually I have to push and prod her to move along in order to leave the house, but she was definitely on board and ready to roll.  She grabbed a stuffed puppy she had just crafted that morning with my mom and hopped in the car.

Caitlin is very shy around new people and new situations, so we've been talking and preparing for stuff like this.  While we were in the car on the way to get our hair cuts, I was asking her questions about how she would respond when she was asked how she wanted her hair cut.  I was reminding her to make eye contact (she is supposed to report back to me about her eye color at the end of this) and to speak audibly.  In contrast to the usual "I know, I know, mom" eye-roll, sigh, today I caught her through the rearview mirror with a sneaky grin on her face.  "I wrote her a note already," she told me, proudly, "since I'm always so shy."  After inquiring about it, she read it to me...and I just died.  First of all, because:

Dear Brber Shop.

 and then:

Hi, My Name is Caitlin. I just want my hair cut strate. Thank you!!

 Amen, sister! I just want your hair cut strate as well!
And second of all, she didn't mention this to John or my mom, whom she was with all morning.  She must've been thinking a lot about needing to talk to an unfamiliar person and worried.  Do fears like this work themselves out with continued socialization and maturity, or how do I help her? I'm sad that she is plotting how not to have to talk to people.  So, that'll give me something to read about this weekend.

In the end, the new hair stylist, Ashely, was this lovely, soft-spoken young lady.  Caitlin took right to her and completely forgot about the note.  She left the waiting area (which was about 8 feet from where my chair was) and sat in the empty chair next to me, so that she could be with us.  She chatted up Ashely the whole time.  When it was her turn, she declared that she wanted her hair cut short.  Was she sure? YES!   I sat back and caught up on Hollywood gossip in the waiting area and the two girls hung out and talked the whole time.  Caitlin LOVED the whole thing.  She felt really special.

On the way home, she said she felt good because she was sure that Ashley was her kindergarten teacher's daughter since her name was Ashley and she had dark hair.  I'm not so sure, but whatever works.